tOchan

First time I heard the word TASHAN in Aamir's cola ad...Remember "Yara da Tashan!"
the word is catchy and so does the meaning...tashan means STYLE. and yeah the promos did promise that. I was totally floored with the songs, looks and in general packaging of the movie. So we wind up our work quickly on Friday evening and land up in Hitek theatre for 9 PM show.


I must confess that we had huge expectations with the movie and why not!...... Ok agreed Dhoom and Dhoom2 were downright flat on scripts front but still I had huge faith on Vijay Acharya the WRITER and in this case even the the DIRECTOR. I mean that fellow has delivered some of my all time favourite Television series (Just Mohabbat and Jassi Jaisi Koi Nahin), Akshaye is in top gear so does Kareena, and Saif and Anil Kapoor are always reliable.

And the movie started...its has a caption TASHAN the ESSTYLE the BAD LUCK the FARRMULA....No Its tOchan_the PAIN the BAD LUCK the TORTURE. It was our BAD LUCK that inspite of country wide boycott on movie by multiplex screens, we able to get tickets in Only Single screen theatre of Hitek City, it was absolute TORTURE of 3 hours and PAINfull experience of watching your money and times goes in vain.

It's fine with us, if you make movies with No logic, no sense but there is genuine problem here. We have seen movies with attitude, esshtyle, confusion, class but TASHAN is movie with arrogance. Mr. Acharya knows he has no story \screen play, no catchy dialogues all he has got an amazing star cast, peppy music and loads of money. Perhaps he knows whatever happening on screen is utter crap and still he wants us to buy that (and in fact we did :( ).

Want to hear eShStoryLine? (Just read the way I have written and feel the same agony I have been through).

Jimmy Cliff (Saif) ij a guruji of bhery good engleesh, who teaches english to hamaar bhaiyaaji (Anil Kapoor) so that he can do vartalaap with the foreign delegation coming in next week. Pooja(Kareena) is hamaar bhaiyaji's assistant and Jimmyjis love interest. So one fine day Poojaji telling Jimmyji that she has taken bahut sara karja from Bhaiyaaji and wants hij money back or Poojaji should shadi with Bhaiyaaji. Jimmyji ghussese aag babula hoing and decides to chorring Bhaiyaji's money (around 20 crores) and bhagging with Poojaji.

But happening something ulta, Poojaji take away all the money and now Policewa, Bhaiyaaji and Bhaiyajji's recovery agent Bhachhan Panday (Akshaye Kumar) all are sniffing Jimmyji's back. It's a cat and dog fight between all these characters. With loads of music and action.

Now you may be interested to know what happens nexht....but I am in no mood (and strength) to spill the beans (because ideally there aren't any beans left) all left is the expensive, lavish tochan we see on the 70 mm screen.

Music: Jhoom Barabar Jhoom's music was good..but even there it was the same story (or I should say No Story), Music is catchy, different and at first it looks original as well (Since it's not by Pritam...so you can say that)

Akki bhaiyaa: He is adorable but so damn repetitive, except the get up everytime its the same Akshaye Kumar (be it Fir Here Hheri, BhagamBhaag, Garam Masala or even little cameo in OSO) its all same.

Kareena -Saif chemistry: What's wrong bebo? when Shahid Kareena came together for the first time, in that movie she betrayed Shahid (FIDA- that was one hell of a movie) in this movie in one scene Saif calls Kareena "Chheenal!" I mean cmmon guys, we expect something more romantic from you.

Just Kareena: There lots have been said (and shown) about Kareena's slim and trim looks. with loads of skin show (or boneshow?)Bebo's did make her mark (especially in green bikini). [I watched 30 mins STAR NEWS's special report on how she loosed some 14 KGS for this movie] I mean we don't want Refugee's lady Randhir Kapoor but she literaly looks malnutritioned in most of the scenes. and even the Geet hangover (From JWM) is still there.

Anil Kapoor: Black and White, Race and now Tashan, seems that Anil Kapoor wants to prove something here. Versatility? We know you have it Mr. Kapoor.
Comic Sense? you have proved that ages back.
Adaptability? you are still here, that says a lot.....then what are you doing here?
STOP doing such movies, In fact nobody should do such kind of movies.

Just Saif: well he back to square 1 Mr. Casanova (just the way he used to in Ashique Awara, Aao Pyar Kare and Yeh Dillagi). And moreover he has nothing to do.

After 150 mins tochan there is only one thing comes in your mind ...WHAT A WASTE?

P.S. For all those who dont know the meaning of tOchan...it's Deemagko SHOT