re-post

"Aho kashala netay tyala shalet? kahi gadbad hou shakte ki" ("Why are you taking him to school? There might be some problem") my neighbour warned my mother as she was taking me to school at around 6:30 in the morning. However there were many speculations going around those days and my mother chose to give a deaf ear to friendly neighborhood's advice.

1992, I was in 4th standard and preparations for scholarship exam were in full swing, but somehow during lunch break we have been told that they are calling off for the day and afternoon batch will not have any classes. Then, I used to live in Kurla, ~70% Muslim populated and supposed to be communal sensitive area. My school was in Sion, and I used to come to school by train, 4th standard kid is too little to travel by his own, specially when the situation is not ideal.

But what was the situation out there? For 9 years old it was a bit more complex to comprehend. School authorities were not allowing kids to travel by their own and hence we have been asked to wait until parents will come to pick us up. The school was 80% empty by 11:00 AM and as time passed the eerie feeling was sulking in, even the empty school ground was not appealing any more, I was waiting there for almost 4 hours now and feeling of hunger was far away. It was 3:00 PM and there were only 4 of us, me, Praful, Trupti and  a peon (we used to call him mama). Trupti's mom came to take her home and as per what she told to mama, things were really bad out there. All I care was to go home. 30 minutes later I saw my both parents. I was happy to see mom there but equally surprised to see my father (isn't he supposed to be in office by now?) They thanked mama for staying with us and took me and Praful to nearest restaurantGurukripa. The owner was about to close for the day at 3:45, but when he saw 2 kinds he allowed us to get in and we had some food. Soon Praful's dad came in and took him.

"What's the matter, what took you so long?" the obvious question from me to parents.

"There are no trains and we came walking till here" mom replied,

"So how would we get back to home?" I asked again.

"We will get to the Sion station and see how the things are" as baba replied, we have started walking towards station.

There was a huge crowd waiting at Sion station, railway announced one special train to Kalyan, may this was our only chance to get in train and reach home as soon as we can. We were desperate, so as every other person on that station. Somehow we could catch that train and reached home. There were policemen all over the place making even the daily route look so unfamiliar. There was a mosque almost 50 meter away from my home, and you could see it from window, as soon as we entered the home, my mom closed the window and said this will remain close for few days at least. Perhaps the first sign of fear coming to home. As I was at home my parents were still worried about both of my sisters who were still in college. One in Vidyavihar- a nearby suburb to Kurla and another at Mahim - an equally sensitive area. It took us 5:00 to reach home, an hour later my elder sister returned home. and by 6:30 we got a call that my second sister has reached safely at my aunt's place in Vile-Parle.

I have been told that my school will be closed for some days now. "Wow!!!"  that was my first reaction. Ignorance is bliss...very true. Someone called us, saying get to the terrace there is one jewellery shop has been set on fire. Of course I have been asked to stay at home only. But no complains....no school for few days, I was really happy. I went to the sleep without worrying that I need to get up early for school tomorrow.

This post is not to open any debate or make any stand. It's neither to support or oppose what happened on and after 6th December.....it's just to tell what happened on 6th December from a 9 year old's point of view. But almost 18 years later I still do not know what we got out of it. Some might say it's Hindu's revenge, some might say a payback or some might call it an action better late than never. It's still hard to comprehend for me what all this worth for? Perhaps only raam jane (God Ram only knows)

Yeh Teesra Saal Hain...

Inspired by Prasoon Joshi's poem on 26/11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3rZmCw_BPU

Yeh Teesra saal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.
Na jaane kitni mombattiyan jalee, NEWS channel walon ko TRP mili
Baaten toh bahut hue, Shahido ko shradhanjali mili
Par uske baad kya?
Yeh Teesra saaal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.

Aaj bhi Gateway pe khule aam ghum sakta he koi bhi
CST station pe mere pados mein baitha koi aatankwadi to nahi?
Shaq aur asuraksha badhti ja rahi
Kya uska koi ilaaj hain?
Yeh Teesra saaal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.

Kasab tod raha he muft ki rotiya jail mein
Uska vakil bhi kar aaya sair, Big Boss ke ghar mein
Ujwal Nikam ne diye bytes har channel ke liye
Aur hum dhoond rahe he conspiracy Karkare ki maut mein
Patil, Deshmukh se istife mangvaye
Aneko dossiers idhar se udhar bhijvaye
Kagzon me simat padi hain aman ki aasha
Yeh Teesra saaal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.

Yeh koi pehli baar nahi tha,
Yeh kuchh aakhri bar nahi hain,
Aaj bhi jab dekhta hu, police ki jang lagi hue bandooke
Sochta hu, kya yeh bacha payenge apne aap ko AK-47 se?
Yeh Teesra saaal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.

Janta hu ek din mein kuchh nahi badlata,
pechida hain mamla, etni jaldi hal nahi milta
Waade to bade bade kiye, batein bhi bahut sari hue
Par kya koshishe kaafi hain?
Itminan hain?
Har saal 26/11 ko yahi sawal hain
Yeh Teesra saaal hain, aur abbhi wohi haal hain.

-Abhijit Arun Chonkar

6th December 1992

"Aho kashala netay tyala shalet? kahi gadbad hou shakte ki" ("Why are you taking him to school? There might be some problem") my neighbour warned my mother as she was taking me to school at around 6:30 in the morning. However there were many speculations going around those days and my mother chose to give a deaf ear to friendly neighborhood's advice.

1992, I was in 4th standard and preparations for scholarship exam were in full swing, but somehow during lunch break we have been told that they are calling off for the day and afternoon batch will not have any classes. Then, I used to live in Kurla, ~70% Muslim populated and supposed to be communal sensitive area. My school was in Sion, and I used to come to school by train, 4th standard kid is too little to travel by his own, specially when the situation is not ideal.

But what was the situation out there? For 9 years old it was a bit more complex to comprehend. School authorities were not allowing kids to travel by their own and hence we have been asked to wait until parents will come to pick us up. The school was 80% empty by 11:00 AM and as time passed the eerie feeling was sulking in, even the empty school ground was not appealing any more, I was waiting there for almost 4 hours now and feeling of hunger was far away. It was 3:00 PM and there were only 4 of us, me, Praful, Trupti and  a peon (we used to call him mama). Trupti's mom came to take her home and as per what she told to mama, things were really bad out there. All I care was to go home. 30 minutes later I saw my both parents. I was happy to see mom there but equally surprised to see my father (isn't he supposed to be in office by now?) They thanked mama for staying with us and took me and Praful to nearest restaurant Gurukripa. The owner was about to close for the day at 3:45, but when he saw 2 kinds he allowed us to get in and we had some food. Soon Praful's dad came in and took him.

"What's the matter, what took you so long?" the obvious question from me to parents.

"There are no trains and we came walking till here" mom replied,

"So how would we get back to home?" I asked again.

"We will get to the Sion station and see how the things are" as baba replied, we have started walking towards station.

There was a huge crowd waiting at Sion station, railway announced one special train to Kalyan, may this was our only chance to get in train and reach home as soon as we can. We were desperate, so as every other person on that station. Somehow we could catch that train and reached home. There were policemen all over the place making even the daily route look so unfamiliar. There was a mosque almost 50 meter away from my home, and you could see it from window, as soon as we entered the home, my mom closed the window and said this will remain close for few days at least. Perhaps the first sign of fear coming to home. As I was at home my parents were still worried about both of my sisters who were still in college. One in Vidyavihar- a nearby suburb to Kurla and another at Mahim - an equally sensitive area. It took us 5:00 to reach home, an hour later my elder sister returned home. and by 6:30 we got a call that my second sister has reached safely at my aunt's place in Vile-Parle.

I have been told that my school will be closed for some days now. "Wow!!!"  that was my first reaction. Ignorance is bliss...very true. Someone called us, saying get to the terrace there is one jewellery shop has been set on fire. Of course I have been asked to stay at home only. But no complains....no school for few days, I was really happy. I went to the sleep without worrying that I need to get up early for school tomorrow.

This post is not to open any debate or make any stand. It's neither to support or oppose what happened on and after 6th December.....it's just to tell what happened on 6th December from a 9 year old's point of view. But almost 18 years later I still do not know what we got out of it. Some might say it's Hindu's revenge, some might say a payback or some might call it an action better late than never. It's still hard to comprehend for me what all this worth for? Perhaps only raam jane (God Ram only knows)

Raj Thok-rey

So here is the deal, you listen to me or I will beat you.

You don't speak my language, in my state, I will beat you.
Call Mumbai -as Mumbai or I will beat you.
You come to my state to appear in an exam? Snatching jobs of my people, I will beat you.
No jobs in your state? You come to my state to work hard and earn money for your family, no no! it's not happening. Go back to where you belong, beg, borrow, steal or simply die. Do not come to my land, or I will beat you.
What?????? Valentine's day celebrations in my state, mad or what? it's against my definition of culture, throw those roses, burn the cards...chocolates?? that sucks...stay away from this or I will beat you.
You insult my people by talking in your mother tongue in my state, now sure I will beat you.
People support me, to beat you.
People call me their savior because I beat you.
62 years of Independence, can you beat that!

Monsoon Waiting

it's 9th July and I am still waiting for proper monsoon here [here-Hyderabad]. I just hope by the time this blog is posted, there is plenty of rain all over India. Today central government declared drought in Madhya Pradesh. That's bad and makes me more worried about coming days. There is Marathi movie releasing soon named "Gabhricha Paus" [the damned rain], which talks about farmer suicides in Vidharbha, lack of sufficient rainfall is one of the reason for such suicides. It hardly rains in Hyderabad during daytime, and even at nights it’s mostly lots of lightning and drizzles. I really pity for school kids here, they hardly get any holiday due to heavy rains. That is what I like about Mumbai rain and makes me more nostalgic. I often sing a song during monsoon season "Meri 2 takiyedi naukari mein, mera lakhon ka sawan jaye!!"

There is nothing rosy and romantic about Mumbai rain in fact it makes city filthier, still I love 'Mumbai Rain'. Mostly it is untimely and creates lots of havoc but the best thing and (what I m missing most) are the monsoon treks and monsoon weekend trips (fondly called as Varsha-sahals). Maharashtra truly blessed with some of bestest forts in the world and equally gifted with the people who know how to enjoy it.

In Hyderabad when you ask for a trip in Rain they often reply (and reject) saying "No yaar, tabhi to barish hogi."

Go for a long drive on Mumbai-Pune Highway in rainy season it’s an awesome view, Rain can make any place beautiful if you don't believe me check out "Sawaan barse tarase dil" song. It has been shot on roads of Mumbai in rain, two lovers dying to meet each other but rain playing spoil spot. But even rain can not stop the true lover "Barkha mein bhi dil pyasa hain, yeh pyar nahi to kya hain?" that's my most favorite song for rain.

I heard that Tansen's singing was so magical that his raags used to make rain but I believe that rain itself is magical. C’mmon, we all start humming our favorite song when we are sitting on our couch with cup of hot tea and there is rain outside. Yes, rain is magic. Alas! The only synonym for rain in English is ‘precipitation’ (Gosh! this language is so incomplete.) Mohd Rafi and Hariharan are the best companions for rain. You can pull out any Rafi-Dev Anand or Rafi-Shammi combo and have best rain of your life. Or rely on Hariharan and rest is assured. Surprisingly he has some of the best rain songs ever "Tu Hi Re", "Nahi Samne- Taal" and "Sawan Barse" , Hariharan you are my Taansen.

Bollywood delivered really good movies on Rain but surprisingly both new Barsaat (Boby Deol featured in both the movies) has nothing related to rain. On the other hand 'Lagaan' brought the killing monsoon wait and agony on silver screen. “Baarish ho na ho, baarish ka intezaar toh hona chahiye” the dialogue from my favorite movie "Thoda sa roomani ho jaye" sum up the spirit of our Indians.

If we are talking about rain, 2 people have to be mentioned. Duckworth and Lewis, you love them, you hate them but you just can’t ignore them. Whenever there is rain in cricket. You will find these 2 guys just around the corner. Rain can be really annoying ask Roger Federer, he has been through 2008 final. It can be devastating ask every Mumbaikar who has been through 26th July. Rain can be real fun; we all enjoyed those paper boats don't we?

But rain should be there. Global Warming, Green House effect or what ever it is. Ultimately we are the one at receiving end. Just wanted to end this post saying

"Bijli ki talwaar nahi,

boondon ke baan chalayo

kale megha kale megha

Pani to barsao"

Thodasa Rumani Ho Jaye_Part3

This is the third part of this series. In case you are interested please read earlier 2 posts below
Part 1, Part 2

Me: “Let’s take a cab”
Sirji:”Can we walk?”

Now those who know, Taj to Nariman Point isn’t a walk able distance. Sirji was ruining my birthday but somehow I do not want to keep him alone in such a situation. Sirji and his babe were so different from each other from every aspect but that’s why they call “Opposite attracts” or perhaps that’s what it is. Just an ‘attraction’ I mean she is so beautiful and it’s obvious for sirji to fall for her. But what did she look in him?
Or frankly ‘what should one look for in a companion?’ I and Sirji were just walking together without any word. I did not want to finish my 26th birthday over a Bhelpoori. When we came near to Dilli Darbar, I asked Sirji.

Me: “Can we at least have a chicken biryani here?” he nodded. (Goshh!! He looks so funny while thinking.) Thankfully he not only agreed to Biryani but also gave up the thought of walking all the way to chowpatty. I came back home and told mom.

Me: “Yes, please find a girl for me” I surrendered myself in safe hands. I knew mom is going to look for well educated, well cultured a beautiful Indian Bahu. Love is painful and who knows it’s not meant for me. Honestly I felt a bit relaxed to the extent that I forgot that I have code review next day.
I reached late to the office. And I found a mail from ‘dude’ in my inbox saying “Dude! I am back”
Well dude is a friend of mine. Besides he starts his every sentence with word ‘dude’, he is quite irritating. He is good looking, smart, popular and always surrounded with girls (beautiful as well) He was just back from Dallas’s 4 months assignment which I believe I should have got. So in short there were ample reasons for me to be not-so-happy with his arrival. As we entered I felt a bit dizzy. Was that chilled conf room? Or last night’s spicy biryani? Or code review nerves? I saw ‘Dude’ sitting next to projector as I walked towards him. Freaky…… I fainted….dhappp!!!

As I opened my eyes I found myself in medical inspection room. And there was someone. What the!!!

.............................End Of Part3

'aatli baatli futali'

True, 'aatli baatli futali'

Every time when we used to play Hide n' Seek and whenever someone mistakenly spot anyone assuming that he is someone else, we used to shout 'Aatli baatli futalu'. No matter how silly it sounds we never stopped shouting.

Somewhere 'aatli baatli futali' symbolizes a reality check, something that you have thought of is not there, never been there.

I have always believed that Mumbai is the most lively city in India (Perhaps in the world). Be it's festivity, it's chaos, it's craze about movies and cricket, it's social and political awareness all this entirely sum up the so called SPIRIT OF MUMBAI. But what I saw on 30th made me think that, are we Mumbai-kars are just bunch of losers? Who can only crib, complain, comment on existing system? Are we united only for candle vigils or city marathon race? Are we worth blabbering on television talk shows?

Ministers and politicians are so easy targets but when it comes to us, aren't we equally responsible for this system. Karan Johar says "Kuchh nahi badalega" , it sounds so true dude!

Less than 40% voters turn-out and why not most of the hotels in Matheran and Mahabaleswar were 100% booked. That's what we are. And we deserves politicians like this.

And for those who were at home, just did not vote. Because they think that their vote won't change anything then they belong to the country where you need to make wearing helmet compulsory and need to ask people to stand up in cinema halls for national anthem.

Is it so difficult to understand that elections not only gives right 'to elect' but also 'to reject' somebody whom you do not want to see in Power. And 57% Mumbairs just blew their right in air.

If next time someone complains about the system, just show them a middle finger.

Jai Ho!!!

There is fun in re-looking at the things that we have done. May be this human nature sum-up all the recap shows we see at the end of the year. As I look back to 2008, all I can see is Mumbai.

Yes, for all right and wrong reasons. I wonder, how can 1 city influence the entire country throughout the year, but in case of Mumbai, you never know!

People say, it's impossible to take out Mumbai from 'Mumbaikar'...I am a Mumbaikar, Born & brought up in Mumbai, but guess with new norms that is not enough. We discovered a new face of Mumbai at the first half of the year. 'Marathi Manus' (son of soil) Vs. Outsiders (Bhaiyaas)

Uncle Wiki says "With a population of approximately 13.66 million it is the second most populous city in the world" that means 22000 persons\Sq KM, well that's something special. I have been away from the city for last 3 years. But every time I go home (and that happens almost once in a month) I found streets, trains are more buzzing than the before, it's getting more filthy, infrastructure is collapsing by every passing day in short Mumbai is dieing. And what worse no body care about it.

Be it out of political mileage or appeasing voting banks, but the question of migrants came to forefront for Mumbai. Ideally, there should be no restrictions for any Indian to travel\work\live in any part of the country. But having said that...we should address that every city has limits too. May be Mumbai has crossed those limits way back.

As Economic meltdown started to happen, all eyes glued to BSE, Mumbai being the economical epicenter for India.

But what surprised me most is Bollywood's tribute to Mumbai. Last year I saw some of the excellent work by new directors dedicated to Mumbai. Aamir, A Wednesday and Mumbai Meri Jaan, 3 movies set against the backdrop of Mumbai and terrorism. All 3 were so different in their story telling still having the common thread binding all of them together.

But guess, Bollywood was not enough as we received 'Slumdog Millionaire' at the end of the year.

I have seen Dharavi (Mumbai's- rather World's biggest slum) very closely, and I must say The director captured it exactly the way it is. Some of my Friends asked me "What's so different about the movie?" May be to make a good cinema, you need not make it differently. Slumdog's success lies there, it shows the Mumbai just the way it is and to large extent captures the pulse of India too. A triumph of underdog, the sure success formula for any movie (that is what we saw in Lagaan, Chak De etc.) with some really catchy tunes by Rehmaan and yeah the most importantly the city

Slumdog has 4 main characters at it's centre stage, besides 3 main leads, Mumbai plays the 4th character, this city is crowded, unfair, sometime even brutal, really difficult place to survive but still kicking.

But all that has changed on 26th Nov, 26 never been an auspicious date for Mumbai, but this time it went a way ahead. A Wednesday, that is impossible to forget for any Mumbaikar or for that matter any Indian. Have you seen dementors in Harry Potter movies? they live on every good memory...yes, I find these terrorists like dementors. They have power to rip off your good memories and replace it with sorrow. May be Taj \ Trident will get back to normal but the scars will remain. And I wish, it should remain for some time. Those would be indicators of our incompetency to fight against terror. As I write this post today, I remember the TV footage of Mumbai Marathon happened on 18th Jan 09. Mumbai's attempt not just to get back to normal but also start kicking as it used to be.

2008 may not be an ideal year but if there is 1 thing that 2008 left for 2009, that is a HOPE. A hope for better tomorrow. I wish the same to Mumbai.

A Wednesday

Wednesday night 10.45 PM
It was a perfect match, India ahead in the series with 5-0, Yuvi and Viru in top form what more we can ask for? But we wanted more, so after presentation ceremony we switched to NDTV for Shonali Chandra and Jadeja's analysis. The Breaking News was flashing at the screen about a gang war and some sphoradic firing at couple of places in Mumbai including the CST station.


Several ours later, as I am writting this post, a lot has been seen and said, and a lot has yet to be done.
India's Home Minister resigned.
Maharashtra's Dy CM resigned.
Maharashtra's CM will resign some time soon (I hope, he will)
We lost our 3 top cops and many other brave commandos.
City under siege for well around 60 hours.
Endless Breaking news, chat shows, live coverage, leads and fallouts of this terror attack.


The trauma,anger, rage, apathy, frustrations, fear Mumbai and for that matter an entire nation is going through this bundle of emotions. Needless to say we will bounce back..we have to get back to normal because we just can't afford to hold back.


Mumbai has seen a lot, our trains are not safe, neither Raiways stations nor buses, not even cinema halls, they striked at our public places, we can't go to cafe' or restaurants now, not at bazaars and temples.Please tell us a single place which is safe in this city?





Earlier these photographs used to remind us the good time we spent near Taj and Gateway. But now they have succeeded to wipe out these good memories. Taj won't be the same. Mumbai won't be the same again.



It all started with 1993 and 15 years down the line,after 15 attacks to the city, we are still at ground zero.


I always belived that, Mumbai is India's maximum city, True, it has been through maximum pain as well. Our helplessness often glorified with the name of Mumbai Spirit.


'A Wednesday' is a movie that depicted a trauma of a Common Stupid Mumbaikar, who is scared of going out today. Nobody is cared about his life. Naseeruddin Shah excellently portrayed the character who is on a mission to teach a lesson or two to Mumbai Police and in a way to entire system. Alas! all these things happen in movies. We still haven't learned our lesson.
All we can do is thank god that we are alive today....cynical but true.

BOMB'e Meri Jaan

People look at Mumbai as a city of dreams and also they call it a city that never sleeps. That's not fair! You can't have dreams without a sleep. But this is what Mumbai all about. I see it as an unfair city.

Mumbai is rude, arrogant and sometimes unfairly supportive to their people (that is evident from crowd's showoff in cricket stadium) but still we just love to be the way we are. We never claimed that it is the best city of the country (we can not), living here is just a constant struggle but it teaches the survival in it's own way.

The city that is paying more than 50% of country's tax, have been an economical power house for decades, is now dying. Be it natural calamities or political power game or the terror, that strikes the city every now and then.

It got hits at every places where it hurts the most. The city is still standing tall. I always wonder what keeps this city going? Is that what they call a MUMBAI SPIRIT? or it's just a glorified name we have given to our fear and helplessness that says "We just can not afford to hold back"

I, Being a Mumbaikar by birth was very keen about the movie 'Mumbai Meri Jaan' that claimed to talk about spirit of Mumbai city.

That reminds me, one more thing about Mumbai, everyone here is Mumbaikar as you do not need to born here to be one (perhaps that is the best and the worst thing with this city). As soon as you learn to board in local train during rush hour you are Mumbaikar,

you started loving Wada-Paav you are a Mumbaikar,

Irrespective of how filthy it gets in rain, if you still enjoy Mumbai rain you are Mumbaikar,

you find Juhu and Girgaon chowpatty beautiful, you are Mumbaikar,

If you call cops "Pandu" , if you ask for extra paav with Paav Bhaaji and finds nothing wrong with Bhelpoori\PaniPoori and Chinese stalls, then for sure you are a Mumbaikar.

So, 'Mumbai Meri Jaan' talks about Mumbaikar, about the pain, fear, tribulations and constant struggle Mumbaikar faces, particularly post 7/11 bomb blasts that stirred the city all over again. The 5 protagonists of the movie belongs to different stratum of the city.

The first one is Madhavan, a well-to-do, white collar professional who thinks and cares about the society, prefers public transport over a personal vehicle just to avoid pollution and traffic chaos, turns down every foreign opportunity just to stay back with the family ( and in his own nation). But one fine day he discovers that his city is not as safe as it used to be. He survives in bomb blast but develops a phobia about it.

There is Soha Ali Khan representing breed of new born journalists, who believe in selling the sensational breaking news rather than telling it with sensitivity. Her life gets thrashed upside down when she becomes news herself. Rupali (Soha) loses her fiance in a blast and her own channel try to capture and capitalize on that incidence. The special report "Rupali banee Rudali" excellently depicts today's TRP Crazy News media.

Third one is K Kay Menon, an unemployed Mumbaikar, a fanatic who believes every Muslim is a terrorist. The one who prefers to stay unemployed rather than working for Muslims.

Irrfan Khan, representing that class of Mumbai, which is continuously denied, refused by so called upper class of the society. Soon he finds out his own way of taking revenge on these people. He utilizes the post blast panic and trauma, as his weapon.

And then there are Tukaram Patil\Inspector Kadam (Paresh Rawal\ Vijay Maurya) from Mumbai Police;the so called guards of sanity and harmony of this city. One who is about retire from his duty and another is still new, enthusiastic and sincere about his job. Learning the psyche of the city in their own way.

All the above 5 protagonists represents every Mumbaikar in one way or the other. There are few threads that ties them together, that are their helplessness but at the same time, a hope for better tommorow. The movie amazingly blends both the things. It touches some more areas like Sunil More (a constable who raped a teenage girl in Police Station), attack on World's Super Power, brain drain etc.
If you like to watch the movies that make you think. Then 'Mumbai Meri Jaan' is movie for you.

It's surely at least 30 minutes stretched, sometimes gets boring, sometimes overstates its point and sometimes goes in documentary mode. But if you can neglect these, then Movie is good.

अर्धवट भाग पहिला

"बरेच दिवसात काही लिहिले नाहीस रे?" माझ्या अनेक मित्रापैकी फाइनली एकाने मला विचारलेच...कारणे (की सबबी?)द्यायच्या झाल्याच तर त्या अनेक होत्या...

"अरे sollid काम होते रे"..(हे त्यांच्यासाठी ज्याना माझ्या प्रोजेक्टची सुतराम कल्पना नाही)

"I need peace of mind for writting"(हे त्यांच्यासाठी ज्यांना माझ्या लिखाणाची सुतराम कल्पना नाही)

"अरे ebloggerची site गणलीये" (आणि हे त्यांच्यासाठी ज्यांना माझ्या ब्लॉगशी आणि थोडक्यात माझ्याशी पण काही देणे घेणे नाही) पर इन सबके बावजूद (माझ्यात कधी कधी जावेद अख्तर\अनु मलिक\ सतीश शाह अशी कुठल्याही TV टॅलेण्ट शोच्या judgesची आत्मा घुसत आसते...तुम्हल पूर्वकल्पना असलेली बरी) तर.....

"मी गेले काही दिवस का नाही लिहिले?"


मराठीत एक अत्यंत समर्पक शब्द आहे.. आरंभशूर...

(आरंभशूर 'म्हणजे जो सगळ्या गोष्टीची सुरूवात अगदी जोशात करतो पण फक्त सुरुवातच', well begun is half done अशी म्हण जरी असली तरी उरलेले half पूर्ण करणे तितकेच महत्वाचे असते by the way आरंभशूर हा शब्द केवळ मराठीत सापडतो का हो?) मला त्यासाठी हिंदी किंवा english प्रतिशब्द मिळाला तर हुडकून द्या तेवढा.

तर गेली कित्येक दिवस काही ना काही लिहायचे डोक्यात होतेच...पण केवळ डोक्यात ...ते कागदावर (पक्षी: कीबोर्ड आणि तिथून वेब pagesवर कधीच उतरले नाही) आणि आज जेव्हा बरेचसे विषय त्यातली रंगत हरवून बसले आहेत मला अचानक त्यांचा सोक्ष-मोक्ष कसा लावावा त्याचा पेच पडलाय.

अर्धवट मध्ये माझे अर्धे-उरले सुरले असे पोस्ट्स आहेत त्यांचा एकमेकांशी (किंवा तसाहि) फारसा काही संबंध नाही, पण त्यावर विचार करण्यात मी जसा वेळ फुकट घालवला तसाच तो तुम्हीही वाचण्यात घालवावा अशी माझी आपली एक असुरी इच्छा... तर सुरूवात सध्याच्या ज्वलंत विषयावर

.....नाही! inflation नाही, पेट्रोल टंचाईपण नाही ...आणि अगदी खलिदेखील नाही...

IPL वर काहीतरी लिहायची इच्छा (की खाज?) बरेच दिवसापासून होतीच. त्याला उचल मिळाली (की उंगली केली) जेव्हा पन्क्याने IPL मॅच बघायला जायचा बेत केला... शहरापासून almost 20 kilometers बाहेरच्या त्या मैदानावर आम्ही याची देही याची डोळा "Deccan Chargersना " डिसचार्ज होताना पहिले...तो IPLचा ताम-झाम्, नको तेवढे फुटेज मिळालेल्या Cheer Leaders आणि कचखाऊ वृत्तीच्या Hyderabad आणि Bangalore टीम्स सगळे डोक्यात साचून होते पण कधी ते शब्दात नाही उतरले आणि तसेपण कोणी काही अजुन लिहावे असे काही उरले पण नाही, चाऊन चोथा झालेल्या IPLमधून मी काय शोधून काढणार? ... Postचे नाव होते..

"मनो-रंजन का बाप और क्रिकेट की माँ बेहेन"

मैं गीता पे हाथ रखके (मेरा मतलब हैं भगवतगीता पे हाथ रखके ) कसम खाने को तैयार हूँ के मेरा IPL के matches देखनेके पीछे कोई ग़लत मतलब नही था। मुझे reverse sweep और reverse swing में क्या अन्तर हैं वह पता हैं, में जानता हूँ के प्रवीण कुमार, रोहित शर्मा नामके कोई struggling actors नही बल्के cricketers हैं, मुझे पता हैं के fine leg, gully, silly point इन fielding positions का cheer leaders से कोई वास्ता नाही और में IPL के आठो टीम के कम से कम ४ खिलाड़ियों का नाम बता सकता हूँ। इन सबके बावजूद मेरे IPL matches देखनेपे सवालिया निशान उठाए गये.

1st May(Thursday) को International Workers' Day होता हैं और दुनिया के बाकी मजदूरों की तरह हमें भी छुट्टी थी. अब तो दो ही रास्ते थे, या friday को छुट्टी लेके long weekend का मज़ा लो, या फिर Hyderabad की गरमीमें पड़े पड़े पीघल जाओ. तभी पंक्याके दीमाग की बत्ती जली(finally) और IPL match देखने जाने का प्रोग्राम बना luckily 1तारीख को Hyderabad (Deccan Chargers) Vs Mohali (Punjab Kings XI) की match Hyderabadमें थी . फिर क्या! 4\5 फ़ोन घुमाए, 2\4 SMS किए और 8 पन्टर जमा हो गये. बुकिंग किया तभी IPL शुरूभी नही हुआ था, पर टिकेट इतने आसानी से मिलेंगे ऐसा लगा तो नही . फिर्भी पहली बार stadium में जाके मॅच देखने का excitement तो था

Uppal's Rajiv Gandhi stadium (that is the case with Hyderabad. Every new thing comes out here has name Rajiv Gandhi Interenational, be it Airport or Cricket Stadium) was more than 20 KMs away from the city. Just like any other first timers we wanted to spend as much time as we can in the stadium. Our specially booked cab took us there almost 2 hours in advance. The Rajiv Gandhi Interenational stadium was nowhere matching to international standards (as if I know what are those, but still I belive the stadium which can accomodate 30,000+ crowd should have atleast 1 restroom). 250 bucks tickets asked us not to bring any posters\hoardings\banners in short all the time we spent thinking about posters and banners were gone in vain. ITC was promoting there newly launched biscuits and were distributing 3 packs\ head.

As we reached inside, the view was perfect. Much against our speculations or because the groud was really small, we could able to see most of the cricketers. What followed after that was same old same old. We got to see the serial kisser Emran Hashmi and his new pray Sonal Chauhan as they hop on to promote their upcoming movie Jannat. Without much delay fiannly they arrived..They means the cheer-leaders, I must confessed their performance rather than the drop dead boring match. As always Hyderabad lost that encounter too but in an all I enjoyed the show. It was more like watching a 200 minutes long movie. It had all the action (when I say action I mean it) a bunch losers stared throwing those free biscuit packs on Cheerleaders. Ultimately they have to stop their show in between the match (ohhh nooooo!)

आता IPL Season 1 संपून 15 दिवसदेखील लोटले. सुरुवातीला कोणी कितीही नाक मुरडली तरी थोड्याफार प्रमाणात सगळेच त्याच्यात involve झाले. हा ब्लॉग लिहायला घेतला आणि एका-मागोमाग एक बरेच काही घडले ...काही इथे लिहिले काही अर्धवटच राहीले

This is Not Fare

Date: 5th June 2008
Time: 8.50 A.M.
Venue: Gachibowli Junction (Hyderabad), 5 KM away from Manikonda Campus.

There were 7 autorickshaws standing in a queue. A sight I have never seen in last 30 months (Usually there are 2\3 autowallas fighting to claim passengers for their auto.)
I was pleasantly surprised, the day finally arrived when they learned the importance of queue. But much to my surprise most of the crowd was still standing.
I asked "Wipro?"
Autowala: "Chalo, par 10 rupaye lagege." (generally they cost Rs. 5)
Me: "10 kyun?"
Autowala: "Arey Sir, diesel ke bhaav badh gaye na."
Me: "3 Rupayese woh bhi 1 litre ke liye, yeh toh double kar diya tum logone"
Autowala: " Yahi rate hain ab, aana he to aao."

There were 4 others waiting behind, for me to stop the argument and get into the auto. There was unity within autowalas that I have never seen before. The decision was unanimous, Gachibowli to Wipro would cost 10 Rs.

It was already 9 by now. I said "Chalo"

Thodasa Rumani Ho Jaye_Part2

Wedding ceremonies are always boring, be it in Badjatya's and KJ's movies or in real life. On top of it, our Prachi madam is eyeing onsite with promotion and a perfect 3 years younger boy friend.

Mom: "I tell you, your Jyotsna bua is just"
Me: Now what?" (As if I don't know)
Mom: "Arey! When you were in Hyderabad she used to enquire so much about you and Now, yesterday did she even come to you?"
Me: "Yes she did. Now, can I read?" (‘Reading is interesting’...I generally say that to all snob girls, otherwise reading is quite outdated)

I hoped on Orkut...but even Orkut isn't fun anymore. Last day profile view count: 1. just 1? I had 3 scraps for last 2 days. All three were replies to my greeting to them; saying "Thanks you very much". I even stopped sneaking in beautiful girl's profiles. (Should I disable that profile visitor feature?) The unknown friend’s requests from girls (and even from boys) are always tricky.

Mom: "Prachi is going to Germany tomorrow"
Me ( ohh! So Finally client approved)

When a well settled (well paid), o.k. looking (though few pounds extra) software engineer gets bored with his life he reads self motivating forwards. I have 1GB folder of such quotes, stories and images. (To vent out his frustration Sirji eats 10 plates of bhelpoori at chawpatty and next day on a 'sick leave'). I got out of my house and on the way bought one Lays packet. There was Saif on the wrapper. I realized life can't be that bad. I mean look at Saif’s life
"Aashique Awara" -> "Dil Chahta Hain"->"Hum Tum";
"Colgate Fresh"->"Asian Paints"->"Royal Stag",
"Amrita Singh"->"Rosa"->"Kareena Kapoor". ....there is a hope.

I came back home and relogged in to Orkut...saw there was one new scrap that too from Shivani :)
"I am getting married next month"...I logged out.

Dad: " Good Morning"
Me: "Very good morning, Dad, looking very happy today?"
Dad: "because I am, Happy Birthday, beta"
Me: "Ohh, how can I forget my birthday?"
Dad: "because that won’t come in orkut's birthday reminders"
Mom: "Many Many Happy returns of the day"
Me: "So, Where is my birthday gift?"
Mom: "Here you go"
Me: "Maa, These are photos of 3 girls, are they my birthday gift"
Mom: "Dhatt...shameless............ beta you are 27 now"
Me: "Eurekka!!!!!...I know that, so?"
Mom: “This is the ideal time for you to get married, see we are quite liberal, if you love someone just tell us otherwise let us find someone for you.”
Me: “I can do it by myself maa”
Mom: “Its not only for you, its for us as well. At least thats what you can do being our only son”
Me: “You know, this is emotional blackmailing”
Dad: "We are not forcing you and ultimately that would be your call."

Call.....yes it's my call.
Me: "Dude, I am screwed"
Sirji: "Yes, I am screwed"
Me: "Is it anything to do with your code review?"
Sirji: "Not that, she, she wants to break this engagement "
Me: "What?........... Why?"
Sirji: "She thinks I am insensitive, irresponsible, immature fool. Could you believe that?"
(Silence)
Sirji: "Could you help me in that? I called her for meeting tonight”
Me: “Dude, what can I do in this?”
Sirji: “You can convince her that I am not what she thinks" Sirji dropped the call

Great Birthday! I am 27, still single (though Mom is on "Perfect Bahu Hunt") and my dear friend left me with this daunting task. Honestly she was better than Sirji in every aspect. But I know Sirji really loves her. He is changing (can't say getting better) but yes. He has stopped watching mundane movies in theatres inspite of that he goes with her on painting exhibitions and attends "Kala Ghoda Festival", nowadays a regular gym hiter, strickly No No to his Bhelpoories and other chat items and yeah he started using "mardonwali fareness cream' too.

At Cafe Mondegar
Me: "Who fixed this venue?"
Sirji" This time it was my call, last time we have been to Sarovar, I just hate that place."
Me: "Which one, that Jahangir Art Gallery wala?"
Sirji: "Yes, I told her that I don’t understand those paintings. What a waste of time."
Me: " And going for 'Rama Rama kya hain ye drama’ movie, what was that?"
Sirji: "I never thought the film would be that bad............... ok chill now; here she comes"

She: “Hi...”
Me (I rest my case, you can't argue with such a pretty girl,
Café Mondegar is a no place to fix your failing relationship; It was smoky, noisy and over crowded. I was confused and totally odd man out and moreover these two not-so-lovebirds were spoiling my birthday eve. Sirji interrupted...)

Sirji: “I love you”
She: “Even I used to love you” (Oops!!)
Sirji: “and now?”
(Silence)
Me ( For them I was the non-conspicuous creature. I felt Sirji really wanted to work this out but the things were getting worse)
Sirji: “Can you give me one more week?”
She: “That won’t help”
Sirji: “Please!”
She: “Why are you doing this?”
Me (I hardly heard what they were talking about but even I had the same question….Why is he doing that?) She left us and Sirji went on to play “I will wait for you” in jukebox (God!! such a drama!)


Sirji: “Let’s go to chawpatty”
Me (I knew this) “Bhelpoori khane?”
Sirji: “Are you coming with me or not?”
Me: “Do I have any choice?”
Sirji: “Of course, everyone has options. Its matter if we want to take it or not”
Me (all of sudden, Sirji was making sense, all this time I was just there, I neither tried to convince her not tried to console Sirji, just to be there was my choice. My presence hardly matters to them...Still I was there.)
Sirji was so right, we all have options. Its matter if we exercise them or not.


.............................End Of Part2

Thodasa Rumani Ho Jaye

Me:" How was the wedding mom?"
Mom: " Oh! the function was fantastic, everybody came except you. beta, its about time you should get transfer at least to Pune."
Me: "yeah, Mom I am trying but this current project is really good, Moreover I can see this Hyderabad as a land full of opportunities"
Mom: "what does that mean?"
Me: "ummm!!!! (pause) How was the wedding mom?"

6 months later....
Me:" So you been to Kranti's godh bharai??"
Mom: "You know, even Kranti's husband started his work from Bangalore and within 2 months he got new job in Mumbai"
Me: "how is Kranti?"

3 months later....
Me" I have attended a telephonic interview for a job in Mumbai"
Mom: " Waah!! so when are you shifting?"
Me: "maa! its just an interview, I personally need to be there for one more interview, but the offer looks interesting"
Mom: " All the best, beta. when are you coming to Mumbai then"
Me: Ahh!! they are OK with this weekend"
Mom: " What should I prepare for you?"
Me: "Anything will do...but yeah make some rawa laddoos"
Mom: " Jyotsna bua was asking about you, now even Prachi got placed through campus"
Me: "Great! how is she?"
Mom: " Should I invite them for this weekend?? Its been ages you have met Jyotsna bua and even Prachi, She looks so beautiful. So should I?"
Me: "How is dad?"

tring tring....
Me:" Hello mam, long time no see. Where you have been?"
Mam: "Hey, you know I am getting married...next month, the guy is working as an onsite co-coordinator fro XYZ co."

Phone dropped... Me: f**k...yeh bhi!

2 weeks later....
Me: "maa!!..you remember the interview I attended...I got through it, they are offering what I asked for. I am so happy Mom"
Mom: "What!!! that company is in Mumbai na!"
Me: "yes ma! I am coming to Mumbai"
Mom: " You serious??? I cant belive, It's been 3 years now"
Me: "yeah I know, but....finally I am coming back"
Mom: "Let me tell that to Jyotsna bua"
Me: "Jyotsna bua?? why??"
Mom: " When are you starting??"

1 month later...back home, Mumbai ..on yahoo messenger

Me: " So, what else you like?"
SweetySavita: " ma fav going 2 disc, freaking out wid frens and ....u really like 2 no, honey?"
XXXXXXBLOCKEDXXXXXXXX

Me: "How was your weekend?"
CuteKavita: " as usual"
Me: " So any plans for this week?"
CuteKavita: "No, same routine"
Me: "Hows work going on?"
CuteKavita: "I don't want to talk about it"
Me: "You watched Jodha Akbar?"
CuteKavita: "I hate movies"
Me: "Tomorrow is India Vs Australia finals"
CuteKavita: "No interest in sports"
Me: "So, what do you like (arghhhhhh!!!)
CuteKavita: "Ohh! It's 10 I better go to sleep, it was fun chatting with you" (really??)

tring tring.......

Me:" Hey madam, you just don't talk to me ohk! it's been 2 months that you have called me and you didn't even reply to my scraps, no online nothing what's the matter?"
She: " I am getting married..."
Me: "Ohh!! Congrads"

26 is not the age of frustration, It isn't the age to be a single.

Hi, I am 26, frustrated and single too. Being a strong beliver of Hindi movies and specially Yash Chopra movies, he has said in Dil to pagal hain (even in DDLJ and Chandani and Lamhe and Veer Zara) that there is someone somewhere is made for each one of us... Really??

Mumbai job was perfect, good profile, well paid and in hometown, what more can we ask for?
Some more fun??

Here no freaking out with colleagues till 8.30 -9.00, you are left with 10% energy level till you reach at home, no gym, hardly any movies at weekends but good food, family life and yeah family functions.

Mom: " Don't keep anything for sunday, we are going for Sanjeev's wedding"
Me: "Maa! I have stopped going out on weekends, my frieds; they are either at abroad or married"
Mom: " Why don't you get married, Sanjeev is 20 months younger than you"
Me: "Is it? he looks quite older na!"
Mom: "Shut up, and haan! while getting home collect your sherwani from dry cleaningwala"
Me: "Sherwani? in month of May, you crazy?"
Mom:" But that looks good on you"
Me: "Ma, they say I look nice even in T shirt and jeans"
Mom: "Who they?"
Me: "My friends"
Mom: "Shall I ask you something?"
Me: "Shoot"
Mom: "Do you have girlfriend?"

tring tring...

Me: "Bolo Sirji, kaisan ho?" (Sirji; a colleague, a friend and a big time despo)
Sirji: “Problem hain"
Me: “I know"
Sirji: “You know?"
Me: "Of course project deadline on Friday and testing review tomorrow, problem toh hona hi hain"
Sirji: "Not that re....I am getting married"
Me: "What???"

Me and Sirji at office cafeteria...

Me: "How could you say, yes?"
Sirji: "Check out her snap"
Me: "So, when is the engagement?"

I can't believe Sirji is getting married. It was never a question of Sirji liking someone....as long she is a girl Sirji likes her. But how can she approved him? I mean look at her. She is so....................
Confession: I am jealous.

At Sanjeev's wedding....
Sheela mausi: "What is your salary?"
Ratan mama: "I never heard name of your company, my brother-in-law works in Godrej"
Chintu: "What is software?"
Prabhakar kaka: "Do you smoke?"

: "Hi"
Me: "Prachi?" (Mom was right she is beautiful)
Prachi: "Bingo!"
Me: "No confusion! Great Combination" (Yeh kehnese pehle mein mar kyun nahi gaya?)
Prachi: "WHAT?"
Me: "No Nothing"
Prachi: "So how are you?"
Me: "You tell, I am standing in front of you"
Prachi: "You put on some weight?"
Me: (shuutts!!) " blame ma for that, otherwise I am still the same. How is the new job?"
Prachi: "Oh it's great, Project is ultimate, except the PM. He is one big %$%&*^%"
Me: (Have I heard it right? I remember Prachi used to make lots of spelling mistakes..she must have mistakenly used that word...or ?) "Well, its the same situation, even my PM is one big.................. (I can't).... (Let's try...u can do it).... (No ..I can't)..."I mean he is pretty bad manager" (Hushh!!!...looser)
Prachi: " I am getting promoted next month"
Me: "WHHAT??" (I realized that I overreacted ...in fact I heard "I am getting married" hihihi) "Congrads...promotion so soon..And onsite?"
Prachi: "Yeah; that too, my visa is ready just waiting for client's approval"
Me: (Stop it Prachi I can't take it anymore!!!)
Confession: I am jealous.
Prachi: "You know, Sanjeev dada's wife is 3 years older than him"
Me: "So what, love marriage mein sabkuchh chalta hain?"
Prachi: "My boyfriend is also 3 years younger than me"

. End Of Part-1

Prologue

Why Mumbai chaat???
Well every place is special and famous for something or the other; like Agra is famous for Taj, Kolkata for it's sweets, Bangalore for it's IT business and how can we forget Dilli ki ladkiyan?
What is Mumbai famous for??

Gateway of India [nahh! वैसे तो दिल्ली में भी India Gate हैं ]
Bollywood [ तो क्या साऊथका Tollywood किसीसे कम हैं क्या?]
Local trains की भीड़ [ well, that's not something we should be proud of]
मुंबई का समण्दर nope! पर समण्दर किनारे मिलनेवाली चाट जो शायद उस समण्दर के रेत जितनीही पुरानी हैं
चाट चाहे हर जगह मिले पर मुंबई की चाट और उसका स्वाद कही और नही मिल सकता.
So this one is for My Mumbai and the things u can get\happen\enjoy\suffer only in Mumbai